Posted by: 지인 | 9 March 2008

10,000 B.C.: Give me my 2 hours back

10,000 B.C. (Blows chunks?)

Takes enough liberties to make any historian’s head spin completely off (or any thinking person’s for that matter). And hey, didn’t “300” already fill this decade’s quotas for spear-thrusting scenes and racially ambiguous casting of brown and brownish actors and creepy dudes with cataracts?

First off, you know, I am finding it harder and harder to suspend disbelief with these kinds of films, where the swarthy, dreadlocked natives with startlingly good dental care all magically speak American English with the kinds of inconsistent pseudo-British accents I’d imagine that 14-year-old role-players use in basements across the country. (Not that there’s anything wrong with THAT. Just saying.)

Don’t even get me started on the blue-eyed messiah/light-skinned deliverer theme. Bah. This film isn’t worth the time it would take to slog through for the purposes of deconstructing. On the other hand, if someone else feels up to defending its cinematic merits, please, by all means, feel free to pull up a rock and start grunting.

The bottom line is, I can’t even say that it was at the very least entertaining, or visually engaging, like “300” was. The most believable characters of the entire 2 hours were the CGI mammoths, and even they could have used some acting lessons.

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Responses

  1. (note to self… forego 10,000 BC if/when I ever find time to watch a movie)

    🙂 So I’m not the only one who wonders about their perfect teeth in movies?

  2. Well, not to sound like a TOTAL nerd, but tooth decay didn’t really become a major issue until the advent of agriculture and the regular consumption of sugary grains. Which, of course, isn’t to say that they all would have had straight, gleaming white teeth, but that they weren’t necessarily brown and rotten either.

  3. p.s. Grunt grunt.

  4. Nakji grunt duly noted.

    And by the way, too bad, you DID sound like a TOTAL nerd. 😛

    But nerds are A-OK ’round these parts, so no complaints here.

  5. $ saved on my side. I did want to see Horton Hears a Who 😉


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